Y Sunday, August 14, 2005Y
9:17 PM
tis is da m0st miserable sunday i eva spent... haiz... s0 sadz... m0m gone for a holidae , fought wif dad , angrii wif ah ma...- fought wif my dad , coz he scolded me bad word... tt's for the first time he eva d0 tis t0 me... it will hurt me and i feeL s0 sad... i will rmb it f0r life... he said sorry to me , but i can't bring myself t0 forgive him... but h0w ii wish i can
- ah ma said dat if i dun come to her hse den forget it.. dat's hurtfuL ... real sadx... haix she called me , can't help it .. cried again... her voice make me feel so terrible
- i miss mom badly... regretted t0 quarrel with her so manii times , talkin her back... i realli wan her back at mom n0w
feeling s0 damn lonely , can't call and forgive dad , juz can't bring myself t0 d0 so... can't call ah ma , c0z she dun wans me t0 i guess ... can't call mom , scared she t0o bz for me...
n0 mom , no dad , n0 ah ma
my life sux...
s0 stressed up...
cryin realli make me feel beta...
Y Friday, August 12, 2005Y
12:16 AM
haiish... l0ng time since i really update my blog. i m feeling verii bad n0w... partly bec0z of wei jian is 0ut but the main thing was that things goes wrong in my life. i cried but wat's the use of it. it's ok dat i m the one taking initiative , becoz i n0e i shld d0 smth about iit. i l0ok back at times we hab and seriously , i felt reali sad dat things hab gone this way . i realli wonder why hab we became like this. izzit dat i hab f0rgot wat we hab spent time t0gether... i dunn0. i thot i kn0w her well , i th0t we r e best of frenz , but someh0w things gone wrong . someway somehow. it is my fault . n0e there is ppl out there blaming me and watsoever. i admit dat it may be my fault. coz i noe i been lately distrated and being s0 insensitive t0 things that hab happened. i really want t0 try hard saving it but i m afraid of rejection . she noes me . i guess so. she will n0e h0w i m feeling too. my character is juz that sucky. i tend t0 choose the easy way out but i forgot dat there is someone waitin for me at the end. i neglected her but i thot she wans me to stay back at times. i m confused. real confused. i did not noe wat to do. how i wish we can tok our heartz out like we used to be. we drift apart . but i n0e dere is some way we can be like b4 is juz dat we did not try hard enuff. without trying , non of us wilL noe wat will happen next. treat it like nv b4 , but i n0e is impossible but this matter will make us mature n cherish this frenship once m0re. it been years , not long and not short . r u willing t0 try hard with me or u choose to back off. is ur choice. i m realli ready . we hab lost courage to confide each other . we hab lost to ourselves. cazn we not be strangers . i dun wan dat to happen . d0 u ? mani qns i wan to ask . s0 manii in my head . confusing me each dae and tangle my tongue. why r we like others. i think i hab break my promise someway somehow. sorry . i do not n0e wat t0 do . things juz get out of hand. i m sadz.i m willing t0 try hard but is n0t juz one sided...
Y Monday, August 01, 2005Y
12:01 AM
i m n0w in the peskii com lab waiting for mr tang... haix... nothing t0 do... seems s0o0o long seems i update my blog... oh god... i will slowly write on wen i free de w0rs... hahax... t0o many things happened in this period of time... g0sh ~ hahax... realli wan t0 write it n0w ! but i m in this stupid com lab waiting for the sentence of death ......... blabla...Derrick r0x !!!!